Friday, November 30, 2007
Saturday, November 24, 2007
Buppie Women…Destined to be lonely?
I just returned from a lovely DC outing, where it was full of black urban professionals (buppies).
While I was awaiting my shot of rum, I came across a very friendly black male. Good looking, educated as we spoke of being in similar colleges in the same vicinity of each other, and was able to carry an interesting conversation. He initiated the conversation and soon we found out he wrote his thesis on the country in which I was from. He said he lived in Capitol Hill, had a very interesting job where he got to travel internationally. He also held 2 degrees from prestigious institutions. The nature of our conversation was friendly.
I invited my home girl over to the bar area to meet him, and somehow the conversation switched to relationships. It came up that he is what a buppie woman would be attracted to. Men like him, I have found tend to be “wanted’ and “in high demand”. Therefore they have the opportunity to juggle many women, without the need to get in relationships. (limited supply= high demand). There is nothing wrong with this, unless you are that woman wanting to get into this relationship.
He goes on to say. Yes he could be like that but he is not. He mentions one case: He met a woman. She realized what I realized that he “has it going on”. But as their relationship developed, her insecurity with his “got it going on-ness” surfaced. She made excuses for not getting to much closer. This to some will be all too familiar began saying things like “You are not ready to settle, you still want to be with other women, and you should go out with you other girls.” This, to my newfound homeboy, showed him her spewing insecurities. He was turned off, especially since he was not trying to be with other women.
So that raised a red flag to me. A clear discrepancy, a fallacy, something is not right here in this game of buppie love and like.
The questions are:
Buppie women, are we insecure with buppie men?
Why do we crave buppie men?
Why does it appear buppie men are limited?
Why do buppie men have the opportunity to exploit buppie women?
It appears to me it’s a cycle
Woman are 50% more likely to become buppie than men. -->Thus there are more buppie women entering the world then men. -->Buppie men are rare. -->Buppie men can choose from a wide array of women. -->Why chose? Have them all the buppie male philosophy. -->Buppie women become insecure.
So are men the reason for a women’s insecurity? Not directly, a lot has to do with the evolution of our society, and how men and women have been socialized, but I would say yes.
What would you say?
Monday, November 12, 2007
This took me back to when I committed the crime of cheating.That previous experience is primarily the reason why I don't cheat. I learned my lesson the first time. No need for repeats.
Its 2007 though. Monogamy is almost a bad word. I mean for real, I look at myself and my future and I realize that my husband is 90% likely to cheat on me, and I am 85% sure I will stay with him.
I credit this phenom to desensitization from the Media: Reality TV, Bill Clinton, Music. Cheating is exciting, Cheating is acceptable in the family, and its cool to cheat. Everyone does it.
Whatever it is, people need to be careful. My thing with cheating is if you are engaging in sexual activities with another individual, you might as well be charged with First degree murder.
With all these diseases going on, one involved with such a risky behavior has to at least increased their likelihood to die by 50%. If not by an STD, but maybe by the person you are cheating on. (SEE any episode of Cheaters).
I also feel that if you are not ready for monogamy, then don't do it. You have got to let your partner know the truth! It is life or death you are playing with. Do not trivialize it.
Friday, November 9, 2007
Good evening to the world. I will be known to you as the District's Buppie. It is my pleasure to have brought this blog spot to your reading pleasure. You see, I enjoy blogging. I enjoy expressing myself. Expression is beautiful in all forms. I will tell you I am not a poet. I am...what I am..
I was told that as a professional woman, it is important that you have solid introduction. A memorized type of spill. But I dislike those parameters. I like to say whatever I feel when I feel it.
Can you tell? Probably not because we are given so many restrictions in this world, that deprive us from being ourselves.
When I hear the phrase, "Me, Myself, and I". I believe that brings true representation of who were are as humans. We are all "fronting". We all don't keep it totally "real".
So when I am asked to introduce myself...What do I say. Depends, if they want to meet "Me, Myself, or I."
Me: A 20 something black female, who overly blunt, selfish, and frighten. Me is the type of girl to do everything by herself if she could. she worries only about herself and can at times be ruthless as she makes her way to the top.
Myself: Silly, careless and smiley. Totally appreciative and loves and thrives in the company of people.
I: I comes off ass well spoken, polite, educated. If you were to meet her, she would intimated you with her how strong she comes off..all the time she is being kind.
Whew...So who would you like to meet first???