Sunday, May 11, 2008

Pu$$Y MALPractice....

Pussy malpractice: ( [poos-ee /mælˈpræktɪs/prak-tis] ) : any improper, negligent practice; misconduct or misuse when it comes to the business of males/females pleasing a woman's vagina.
I know tons of women, straight, bi, homo. We enjoy sex. As Buppie's, we have a more independence and we flaunt that. Our Pussy's are along for the ride. Buppie women can want to smash, beat, get it in...whateva. And fellows trust we do. We plot and plan on the DICK more that you think. Once we decide to give up the cooch, we expect it will be well worth. This can also explain, why some Buppie Women may make you work a harder, to prove you deserve her goodies.

Negotiating and dealing with the game of sex, requires both parties to meet acceptable terms.

Examples of Acceptable Terms are:
  • PAPERWORK: STD ad HIV Screening Proof stating you do not have the heebee jeebees, (if you do not have this, DO NOT PASS GO. LETS TAKE OUR HAPPY ASSES TO THE CLINIC!!!)
  • A Few going on events with meals and drinks in which both parties have come to the conclusion they want to take it further.
  • Or maybe you just want to smash, beat, fuck, bone, or cut, GET IT IN

So you[ a Woman] have been waiting months for that good pipe...holding out on dudes because you don't want to appear "loose". When in fact within the first 5 minutes, you can determine if an individual is fuckable. So you decide the day your going to give it up because, your terms have been satisfied. You on the job thinking about this experience you are going to have with this man.

You meet up and things get the poppin..he kissing on kissing on him.. he tears open the Magnum Trojan. Your thinking YES!! YES!!...

Then the most fucked up thing happens, You lay on your back anticipate the pipe, and he begins humping away, grunting and shyt. You are alarmed because you wondering how did the party get started without you?? Then he says some crazy shyt like "OOO you feel soo good"???

YEA GEORGE I feel you. Ladies you know you make this same face. Your confused because you don't feel a gotdamn thing!!!!

habeas smalldicktus- You know your penis is too small to be fucking me.

YADA YADA, you can try to refute this by pleading a case of SIZE don't matter, but for some it does, and You ARE OUT OF FUCKING ORDER.

Moving on, So its too late to you in the midst of this, so you try your best to forget you cant feel anything just to get through the experience, you in it an entire 66 seconds, when you hear "oooooooah" and just to confirm you look and see this

WAIT. HALT. OO no this dude did not just .... I can't believe this dude just CAME!!!

Factum est minunto- You just came in a minute.

Some men try to claim the defense of THE 1ST NUT BILL, EX Curia Unonuto.

Ex Curia Unonuto also know has The First nut Bill introduced by Sir One Eye William, states that if a 1st nut is achieved within the first 5 minutes of intercourse yet a erect penis follows within 2 minutes and remains erect beyond 10 minutes, the 1st nut in question is dismissed on all charges.

Realistically ladies, we all know that sometimes a man just needs to get the first nut. We hate it, but its just apart of having sex.

If one can build a case for Factum est minunto as the first nut, one can claim it. However, after a fair trail, if you are found guilty of this by a jury of your Peer (the person you are sexing!), you are a for VIOLATING and have committed 1st degree Malpractice!

So, your still in the moment, he whispers, "Girl that was just my first nut." (Exhibit A. He is now invoking EX Curia Unonuto here.) So you must abide to give this man a fair trial. you put in the work to try to get this man back erect. Your arm get tired and to note 3 minutes have passed... There's no coming back.

The Jury says: Guilty as charged.


focusedfemalegem said...

I love this post....shid lol....u aint neva lied!

Exodus Mentality said...

I like a woman who knows what she wants and goes and gets it. You might find less malpractice and more good strokin if you don't leave it up to any man to please you but you get actively involved and make it happen for yourself. A real brother won't have a problem with that.

Nothing you can do about getting short stroked except check your package early. Here again, most brothers will not have a problem with that, even if you postpone delivery of the draws for a lil bit.

And damn, I've been married and monogamous for over 13 years, are you young folks actually carrying around current paperwork on your health status? My how times change.

The District's Buppie said...

Yes times have, and in this day and age you have to and its wise to get tested together, or view the results of the person you seek to get intimate with. I don't carry a copy, but I do make sure my results can be easily obtained, if need be!

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