Tuesday, October 14, 2008

My Night At JAIL! Part 1

Last Saturday, I spent my night at the 3rd District Jail in DC .What was supposed to be a pleasant evening celebrating my Libra friends, and dancing with HAWT Personal Trainer Guys, was a evening of DRAMA and Comedy (Very Similar to a Tyler Perry Movie!)

Break Down of the Atmosphere

Walking into jail, I had thee biggest smirk on my face. It was weird. I knew I did not belong, at the same time it made me chuckle, because of the reason for the arrival. First of all, the dang station was right in the midst of a quiet neighborhood. Right across the street, were homes. How much of a blower is that? Knowing you live right across the street from the PoPos?
The station reminded me of YMCA/School. We walked in, and saw bulletin boards. Trophies. Domestic Violence Literature.

The Officer on Duty, who was working as clerk was husky black female with lots of tude. Similar to MADEA.

At first I was excited. I wanted a tour of joint. I sat my ass in the chairs and looked around took everything in. The place was not modernized, and I wonder why the DC Gov't missed this in its budgets.

Soon after we walked in, an older married couple walked in solemnly behind us. Being that the clerk was loud, I could hear all their business. It seems their SON, a college student, got wrapped up for a DUI. TSK TSK. At this point in his processing, they need to run his prints. Apparently this process was going to take a bit of time, so the parents opted to go home to bed and call back to check in. The Clerk warned them, that if his prints did not come back clean, he would have a Monday Court date. Also the clerk told them do not be surprised if something were to come back, because people hide shyt all the time.. SHAME

Any who after we cracked the initial jokes and took some photos ops, we waited and waited, and waited some more.

We spoke to other people who arrived later in the night. One was a dude who was very familiar with jail and the processes, from experience. He spoke about how this station in particular sucked because things were so slow.
Somethings he said:
"Usually when you wait for something you have a TV, Look they do not even have one."

"One time when I came here, tried to get my friend processed out. The told be their fingerprint machine broke."

One thing,I learned is cops don't give an EFF about Customer Service!!

The DRAMA Beyond the BARS:

So why was I at Jail?? The reason why I went to jail is because a friend, her husband caught a charge. Driving without a valid license. Apparently, he goes to jail often. He is Jail-prone. Now, Husband was with his homeboy on the way to Adams Morgan. Did not stop at stop sign. Husband Homeboy, disappears but has all of Husbands stuff. You know: Cellie, Money, keys to vehicle. Watches Husband get arrested.

Now Husband Homeboy has Husband Car and Cell. Husband in jail, cannot seem to get a hold of Husband Homeboy. He Calls Wife. Wife calls Husband cell phone, which Husband Homeboy is supposed to have. Right. Husband Homeboy does not pick up. MMM

PAUSE. Let me say throughout this situation, I practiced MYOB. I minded my business. However, I did draw my conclusions about a couple of things.

Conclusion 1: Husband Homeboy, Why did he not call Wifey to let her know Husband is locked up?

PLAY. So Husband, eventually begs Wife to come bail him out. Wifey pissed Husband Homeboy abandoned Husband. Apparently Husband Homeboy, has a history of leaving Husband A$$ed out. Wifey dislike Husband Homeboy because of history. There is beef.

WE waited for freakin hours. Wifey of course identifies her self with the Clerk. Clerk says something of the officer processing husband, had some other paperwork to do prior to processing husband. We waited more.

Approximately, three hours into us waiting, Husband Homeboy's shows up. With a Chick.

Wifey of course is pissed. Homeboy pissed. They go at it.

Wifey: "Where you been? all this time??"
Homeboy: The Police told me to come back at this time.
Wifey: Where is his car?
Homeboy : Parked.

PAUSE: CHICK should MYOB. She caught a mean attitude like the situation had anything to do with her.

PLAY. Husband Homeboy bickers a bit. Stops talking to Wife, goes to the counter to bails husband out. The Clerk processes the $75 BAIL.

PAUSE. EXCUSE CLERK. WE HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR 3 Hours trying to bail Husband out!!


This is a pretty long story...So I will Continue.. super long blogs suck!

1 comment:

Taurus Lady said...

You moved up on the buppie social ladder: you're now a buppie with street cred! j/k

Post the rest of your story, give us all the juicy details!

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